A woman asked me the other day if I could get her a medical certificate indicating when I was cured of my depression.
I was so taken aback that at first I did not know what to say. Really in this day and age, do some people really think that depression is something that you take a pill for and it will go away?
I found this site that highlights the 10 misconceptions about depression.
I watched a programme the other day and I women named her cancer, it wasn’t true story, but it got me thinking, my depression is a part of me should I name it, would that give it more control over me or me over it? I like the idea of naming, as by accepting it is a part of me can we learn to live together in a way that is not harmful to me and my mind and body?
Ummmm something to think about, anyway back to the article…. and how I see my depression after reading it…
My depression is like a roller coaster ride sometimes. The ride can be very erratic, or slow and smooth, sometimes with lots of up and downs that almost makes me sea sick. But the one thing I hold onto is that it keeps moving, which is a good thing.
Recognising and acknowledging my thoughts, has enabled me to have more control over the movement of my depression. I will not say I control it, as I am not sure if you really can, but it is moving at a pace I feel okay with at the moment.
The sadness that creeps up on you is something that comes and goes, which I must be very weary of. This for me is the vehicle for my self hate, which is not an easy part of my depression to deal with.
It mentioned, men having depression. It must be really difficult for men with depression. They are taught to not show emotion and to be strong. No wonder there is such a high number of male suicide cases around the world. How do they ask for help? Woman are more able to ask their friends or go for help than men, it is scary to me to think about men going through some of the things I have been through and how they would deal with it, even having a good cry to them could make them feel even worse. JK is a great advocate for men, showing that anyone can suffer with depression, the site he advocates is well worth having a look at…http://www.depression.org.nz/depression
My depression is not a mental weakness, if anything it causes physical weakness, to the point of not even being able to get out of bed sometimes. The lack of energy and motivation is totally detrimental to my well being, hence a vicious circle is created. Always alert for this one.
Bought on by trauma, not always. It is harder to deal with in these circumstances. When I was diagnosed with breast cancer, my depression, never really came into, I never thought why me, as I am no different to anyone else so why not me really. The one thing that surprised me was not thinking I deserved it and sliding into a depressive state. It is funny thinking aback now, I have tried to take my life a number of times, yet when told I have cancer I never hesitated to fight it. This really shows me how my depression is always moving, sometimes it is in the distance and sometimes it engulfs me. After my treatment was finished it was there, but not while I was going through treatment. Even though I was alone and away from home when having the treatment. I should really celebrate how strong I really was at that time, never thought about it before really.
This brings me to my girlfriend, she I think is the only person that actually reads this blog and she said I should write on here all the good things in my life. Well now I have mentioned one above. I will try to add one with every entry on here from now on.
Signing off with the thought I was strong when I went through my cancer treatment, well done me.